{cedar, rocklovepeace baby photo shoot, canon 50d}
dear healing readers ~
its been a bit of a rough-ish week for our family and i am reaching out to you for your thoughts and prayers.
my father had back surgery to remove a cyst as well as have a rod implanted in his spine and screws at his tailbone. he has suffered back and leg pain for years and we are hoping this is his ticket to a pain free life. he is in recovery and very uncomfortable (ouchie rod and staples) and my sweet mother is doing her best to care for him now that he is back home. but...she injured her shoulder (scapula to be exact) doing work on their yard and too is in a lot of pain (arm/chest area) and trying to tough her way through it to care for my father. i had to practically beg her to go to the doctors because she was in a selfless frame of mind.
my older sister darlene is having one of the toughest summer's in 10 years in regards to her lupus. she spends many days on the couch, in deep muscle and joint pain and doing her most awesome best to not go to the dark places in her mind. she is constantly sending me positive text messages about cedar and the photos i send and it blows my mind that she can even think about others when she feels the way she does. i am always learning from her resilience and tolerance. when talking with her on the phone today it really hit me hard how long she has been sick this year. this is when i feel our physical distance the most. when i can't pop over to help my family when they are in need.
then there is sweet cedar. he is having tummy issues and teething stuff all at once. yesterday it was all about projectile puke down my body. we're just learning which foods he can and cannot digest and it seems the only foods that are gentle on his sensitive tummy are pureed sweet potatoes, pears and prunes. when we try new things, even just a little, his belly is a huge ball of air for a few days. poor sweet dude.
and then there is me. i am experiencing some weird deep piercing pains on one of my ovaries, which i know are from my endometriomas (blood filled cysts). today i could barely sit up straight. i am calling my gyno tomorrow but i know what she'll say "take out all your endo! go on birth control! take hormones!". yet it was the hormones i took for fertility stuff that put me here. my body just does not respond to hormones well. my last surgery didn't do much and i am now going to have to get serious about the natural way of healing my reproductive lovelies. i have three natural healing books on endo that i have yet to fully read. time to stop procrastinating because the bad months are getting closer together and now that i am caring for a wee being, i can't lay on the couch and chill.
aren't you glad you popped over here this morning?
i suppose i am sharing all this to ask for some positive affirmations and prayers...especially for my dear daddy, marmie and sis. as we are all a bit tired and worn and are learning that it is okay to ask for help sometimes.
tonight i made spice cake muffins. i never bake. growing up with Celiac gave me an aversion to baked goods because they tasted awful without gluten. nowadays its so much more creative and tasty for us folks. so, i baked. i suppose i had a hankering to cheer up our home in light of this heavy week. the smell of cinnamon and nutmeg floating in the air has to be one of the best heart medicines. i think i might bake more often. now i get what all the fuss is about. it was glorious to watch my husband's blissed out face while eating it hot out of the oven with butter dripping. also fun to sit on the floor while stirring up the ingredients and cedar sitting near me with his eyes glued to the bowl and his mouth open in awe. i imagined all the years ahead with us baking together in the kitchen. i smile as i write this recognizing that having a baby has brought to surface a more domestic me. must. find. cute. aprons.
and ohmygosh look at cedar's face in the photo above. is he not the poster boy for "please pray for me and my family?" ; )
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Winner of gorgeous Bella Wish necklace is...